It's been a while. In fact, I believe tomorrow is the anniversary of this sorry excuse for a blog! Someone left me a comment asking if they could take over this blog because they too were a "Pants" and I suppose must've also been Paleo, and it made me realize that even though no one reads this, I'd like to rededicate myself to it.
Things have been rough for the past few months, and I've lost sight of every goal I set for myself. I tore a muscle in my hip that is apparently a super rare injury, and have been battling hip flexor tendonitis and some major scar tissue in my lower back since the muscle has healed. I've been going to physical therapy and have taken some major rest from CrossFit, and it shows. I think I would have been a lot better off physically and probably more importantly, mentally, had I continued to follow the Paleo lifestyle after I was injured. However, my brilliant little brain decided that since I couldn't work out, I might as well just eat whatever the hell I want!
Not surprisingly, since I've made that decision, my clothes don't fit correctly, I am depressed as hell for no apparent reason, my libido seems to have left for vacation (sorry, babe!), I'm tired all of the time and have zero motivation to do anything, and when I see pictures of myself, I want to just cry.
Sure, some of this could be SAD, combined with stress from work, bad car luck, a lack of those feel-good endorphines that one who can exercise gets, and an impending move, but I am pretty sure the major reason is that I've been chowing down on pasta, bread, chocolate, cookies, peanut butter cups and all manner of junk food like it's my occupation since I was told to give it a rest athletically. Yes, it's completely ass-backwards, I am well aware. I guess that part of me that doesn't want to "ruin" my hard work in the gym with bad food turns off when there is no hard work at the gym being done.
I'm tired of feeling this way and I've decided that right now, in this very moment, that I am going to change. I've once again gotten stuck in that sick cycle of looking to food for comfort, feeling horrible about how I'm looking after eating comfort foods, eating more food for comfort...ad nauseum. It's stopping, right now, and now that I've put this out there, I want you all to hold me to it. I know I won't be Ms. Perfect Paleo, but I want to try harder. Here goes nothin'.
